Welcome to Sugarbeat’s Books – The Home of the Romance Novel!
Today we are welcoming Jo Sparkes to the blog! She is the author of Feedback – How to Give It, How To Get it. Something different than romance for today, but a very important topic, I think. Jo is touring with Goddessfish Promotions and is offering up a $50 Amazon GC to a randomly drawn commenter from the tour. You know how to increase your chances of winning! Just click HERE and follow the tour, leaving comments where you go.
For her guest post, I asked Jo to write a bit on what was the stimulus for this book and do yo think everyone can learn something from your book. Here she is!
– Jo Sparkes
Hello, everyone. How nice to be here.
The stimulus for writing this book is a kid. A college student in a class I was teaching.
First, understand that writing for me had a serious barrier. I’m a people pleaser, meaning it’s important that everyone be happy. And if not, it has to be my fault. I’ll scurry around like a mad woman to fix it.
So getting criticized – about anything – was very hard. The other person was unhappy, and it was my fault.
Writing is the worst scenario – because now the criticism is about your baby. It feels like a personal attack. Emotions ride high. If you’re told, “Love your story! Fantastic heroine! The ending was just a tiny bit confusing for me,” somehow you only hear “BAD ENDING”.
Over the years I gradually found a process for criticism. And a mindset.
There is this belief out there that a professional writer – a really good writer – doesn’t get criticized. Shakespeare never made a mistake, much less heard about it. If you’re a really good writer, you can’t be criticized.
Nonsense, of course. Top pro writers get criticized. The difference is they handle it professionally.
If you’re a writer, think about that. All writers – all human beings – get criticized. Separation comes in they way they handle it.
So anyway, here I am, teaching a class of college students, and one kid stands up. Upset because someone had told him his story had a BAD ending. He was afraid that meant he couldn’t write after all – and he sooo wanted to be a writer. What could he do?
The answer to his question is this book.
I believe all feedback – which is just a kinder word for criticism – all feedback that life hands you is meant to be faced head on and vanquished. You don’t just slip by it in the night. Otherwise it has a way of sneaking up on you when you least expect it.
If you’d like to harness criticism, be it in your writing or something else, then yes. This book can help.
Thank you for allowing me to be here today. What a fun place.
I’d like to thank Jo for dropping by and sharing! As you can see from what you have read, this is an important book to read, whether you are an author, or a mother, or a daughter, or……we all need this book!
Feedback … a kinder word for criticism, is an organic component to life.
When a toddler learns to walk, he falls. He screams, cries – and persists. What would happen to the human race if he gave up after a few bumps?
Before we could read self-help books, before we could understand a language and sit in a classroom, we learned by trial and error. “Feedback” is the natural teaching process. It’s how the creator set it up. It’s how the world actually works.
Here, at last, is a simple process for getting the most from all the feedback the world offers us.
EXCERPT:
That toddler learning to walk is a great example to us all.
The child has no fear of failure, no concern over how foolish he may look to others. He never pauses to consider if it’s worth the effort. And he pays no attention to anyone pointing out that seventy percent of his peers can already walk.
He wants it. He keeps trying until he gets it.
Somewhere along the path of life, we come to perceive mistakes as ‘bad’. We’re told ‘don’t make them; avoid them.’ You don’t get called in to account for yourself if you don’t make a mistake. Some people actually avoid mistakes by not doing anything at all.
That’s the reality. The only way not to make a mistake is not to do anything. Which means no real achievement, no real success.
I spoke to a friend who had achieved a very great deal – he’d made a huge amount of money as an entrepreneur. He was the type of person most would call wildly successful.
Yet it turns out that before he made money, he had lost money. He’d lost enough that those same people labeling him wildly successful now would term him an abject failure. It cost him two businesses.
But he believes if he hadn’t made that mistake, he would have never found the key to success.
AUTHOR Bio and Links:
A well-known Century City Producer once said that Jo Sparkes “writes some of the best dialogue I’ve read.” Not only are those words a compliment to Jo’s skills as a writer,but a true reflection of her commitment to her work.
She graduated Magna Cum Laude from Washington College, a small liberal arts college famous for its creative writing program. Years later, Jo renounced life in the corporate world to pursue her passion for writing.
Taking every class she could find, she had the good fortune to study with Robert Powell; a student of renowned writers and teachers Lew Hunter, and Richard Walter, head and heart of UCLA’s Screenwriting Program.
The culmination of those years was the short-film “The Image”, which she wrote and produced single-handedly. And in so doing, she became fascinated with the dynamics of collaboration on a project.
Since then, Jo hasn’t looked back. Her body of work includes scripts for Children’s live-action and animated television programs, a direct to video Children’s DVD, television commercials and corporate videos. She’s been a feature writer on ReZoom.com and a contributing writer for the Arizona Sports Fans Network; where she was called their most popular writer, known for her humorous articles, player interviews and game coverage. Jo was unofficially the first to interview Emmitt Smith when he arrived in Arizona to play for the Cardinals.
She has adjunct taught at the Film School at Scottsdale Community College, has teamed with a Producer on a low budget thriller, and a Director on a New Dramady.” She went in front of the camera for a video, “Stepping Above Criticism”, capturing a popular talk with her students.
Her new book, FEEDBACK HOW TO GIVE IT HOW TO GET IT, shares her lessons learned with writers, and indeed everyone dealing with life’s criticism.
When not diligently perfecting her craft, Jo can be found exploring her new home of Portland, Oregon, along with her husband Ian, and their dog Oscar.
http://www.feedbackthebook.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“In her compact, wisdom-charged Feedback Jo Sparkes provides sharp, sharp, cogent, advice not only for writers but for all people who value creativity and seek to lead fulfilled, creative lives.
“This slender volume provides more bang for the buck than far longer, weightier tomes. It is a splendid resource to which writers will refer repeatedly.”
– Richard Walter Chairman of Screenwriting, U.C.L.A.
“The lessons contained in “Feedback” are not for the writer who is merely looking for a compliment, but rather for those who are striving for accomplishment.”
– Barton Green Author, Screenwriter and long-time friend
Jo Sparks simplifies the feedback process in this concise easy to implement guide to giving and receiving feedback. As an actress, I believe everyone can benefit from her experience, not just those in the industry.
– Tonetta Weaver, Actress
Mary Preston
I think it is wonderful that you actually took the initial thought & decided to do something about it. You wrote a book that will help many others.
marypres(AT)gmail(DOT)com
Goddess Fish Promotions
Thank you for hosting Jo today.
Sugarbeat
You are very welcome ladies!
Vonda M. Reid
This sounds like a book that addresses a difficult topic. Would love to read it.
Jo
Thank you 🙂
And Sugarbeat, thank you so much for having me here.
Sugarbeat
HI Jo!
Thanks so much for dropping by today! I love the idea of your book. Feedback is something that I do poorly! I need to read your book so I can learn!
Karen H in NC
Hi Jo,
I missed the first week of your tour, so I’ll say today…it’s nice to meet you and read about your book. Hope to be able to follow the rest of your tour.
Very interesting subject you write about. I’m of the feeling, ‘it you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all’ and for the most part, I live by that. I don’t always write reviews for books I read but there are exceptions. If I really loved a book, I have to say so and send kudos to the author. Authors love that! That said, the only time I leave a bad review is when I absolutely hate a book and feel compelled to post my views. Even then, I’ll couch the bad with whatever good points I can find and hope when the author reads my review, she’ll understand why her book didn’t hit with me. And if she’s read your book, she’ll know how to take it without being crushed and/or going ballistic!
kareninnc at gmail dot com
Jo
Thanks, Karen. So nice to meet you 🙂
My Dad was born and raised in NC, by the way. New Bern.
momjane
I think any comments made to an author should be done with kindness. They need to know they must make a correction without feeling that they are a failure. Your book sounds like it fits the bill for this.
Catherine
If anybody thinks that great authors don’t get criticism, just look at Amazon! LOL.
Jo…I’ve read some literature that says it’s more difficult for young people today to receive criticism/feedback. When I was young, children were “corrected.” Some people observe that children today are overly praised. Every child is exceptional. Every kid on the team gets a trophy. Every child’s paper gets a gold star. Grades are inflated. When the “kid” gets into the real world, they get a real shock when they receive less than glowing praise on their first performance review. Has your research revealed this phenomenon?
PS…Interesting about your dad being born in New Bern. I live just down the road in Wilmington, NC.
Regina Ross
Thanks for sharing the excerpt 🙂
reginamayross@gmail.com
Jo
In teaching college (hmmm – I guess it depends on how you define ‘young people’!), I found the students were very open and receptive to it — when it was honest, useful, and well-intentioned. Telling someone ‘you’re no good’ was never well received — but then, it is a rather pointless thing to say.
I have known of 2 cases to have trouble like you described. Both were from parents who refused to correct them, and indeed the problem was they really didn’t know how to handle it when someone finally did.
And one of those cases was 25 years ago.
Phoenix Carvelli
One thought came to my mind while reading this post is that the ideas expressed do not have to be limited to book reviews. What about those wonderful employee evaluations and everyday supervisory duties? People need to think how they would want to receive the information if it was their work being reviewed.
A constructive critique is how one can learn and develop into an even greater writer or person than they already are!
Excellent book topic! I hope to read it and share it with others.
Phoenix
PhoenixCarvelli at gmail dot com
bn100
Very nice post and advice. Sounds like a useful book.
Jo
Thanks so much everyone.
I’ve found it’s been such a help — a process for dealing with all the feedback from the world. Not just people, but things, events. Life’s critique.
I’ve really enjoyed meeting all of you. I wish you the best!
– Jo
Sugarbeat
Hi Jo!
Thanks so much for the visit! Good luck with the book!